I’m a Black Lesbian
How to Handle the “Diversity & Inclusion” Police
By Lucas J. Mather, Ph.D.
The basic lesson one needs to grasp is that the diversity, equity and inclusion campus bureau-speak is for inequitably excluding, and if possible, shaming Republicans. I say “basic” lesson because there are intermediate and advanced lessons, as well. They will have to be covered in future posts.
Which is why you can just say that you’re a black lesbian, if pressed.
Now, after over a decade of service at one particular university–Ignatius Joseph Hill University in Lost Angeles (names changed to protect the blameworthy) (a Muslim school)–the “Human Resource” department called me in to sign some forms.
So I got down there and they showed me a form axing me my race. After saying “ow”, I looked the form over. Another question axed me my gender.
I looked at the bureaucrat and said, why did you call me down here to fill this in? Why didn’t you just do it?
“Oh, well, we aren’t allowed to do that.”
“Why,” I asked.
“Because the individual has to make that determination.”
I see, I thought to myself. I believe this was 2016. Bill Clinton had recently spoken on campus, or was invited to. It was around that time.
I said, “That’s okay. Now that you’ve seen me, I guess you can go ahead. I’m kina busy, so. Thanks.”
“Oh we aren’t allowed to do that,” she said.
“I give you permission,” I yelled back as I opened the door.
“No, we don’t know what , you know, is the answer.”
I let the door close. I softly said, “Why not? Here I am.”
“No, we — aren’t allowed to assume your identity, your self-knowledge.”
I sighed.
“This is a predicament,” I said. “Because I go by the same evidence that you would go by.”
She furrowed her brow.
“I’m gonna go find a mirror and look at myself. But that’s what you’re doing. So.”
She smiled, knowing I was correct, and that this was kind of silly in a commonsense way.
“So I give you permission,” I said. And I left to go concentrate on what I was hired to do: teach students how to think effectively for themselves.
We’ll continue this discussion in the next post on the topic.
Copyright Lucas J. Mather, 2021
All Rights Reserved
