Since I Can’t Say Mary Christmas,

I’d like to wish you a very Joseph Christmas, instead.

By Lucas J. Mather, Ph.D.

And what do we have against Mary, anyway ?

What about women’s rights ?

The Christmas holiday has cut the academic year in half for so long nobody remembers it being any other way, at least in our English-speaking world. And yet for some reason, despite that and despite it being a state holiday, saying “Mary Christmas” on campus is frowned upon. It’s frowned upon in favor of “happy holidays.” Which holiday? Why ?

So, I insert the man’s name, instead. I’ve done this for years and years and years on campuses in Southern California. I’ve done so on public and private campuses. (I’ve never had an issue on the private campuses). I’ve done so on community colleges and big state university campuses. And without fail, when I say “a very Joseph Christmas to you, since we aren’t allowed to say Mary Christmas,” there are big smiles, sometimes giggles, sometimes chortles and guffaws and snorts. People of all descriptions, every political persuasion (meaning, all shades of the One Party Allowed, the Democrats), every shape and size, they react the same way without fail. They smile and they become Merry.

So let this be a lesson to you. Democrats like it when you say the man’s name. They love Joseph, and they apparently hate Mary. I have no idea what this has to do with women’s rights or “progress”, but they all seem to. And if you want a sure way to bring a smile to someone’s face (and for some, that’s the only way they laugh—they smile—that’s them laughing), then wish them , truly, a very Joseph Christmas , indeed.

Their smiles fade when I pronounce the “t” in Christmas the second time I say it, though. So, be forewarned.

Joseph Christmas, everyone.

Copyright Lucas J. Mather, 2021
All Rights Reserved