But Professor, I’ve Never Gotten a Zero B4
New Sheriff in town, and he’s Republican, By Lucas J. Mather
I’ve never gotten a zero before on anything , he who still didn’t have the textbook said belligerently–blamingly–after I showed him his first quiz. Who else got a zero? he asked and several said they got Fs . It’s the professor’s fault, he said.
You picked the wrong ship to mutiny, sailor, I said. I have given an entire class Fs before and so help me God I will again if I have too.
But I’ve never gotten a zero on anything before , ever, they said, him leading the pack.
So, you want to grade your own quizzes? I asked pointedly , head down , eyes over glasses meeting his . I straightened my tie to let out some steam.
No, I just …
As long I’m grading them, you have to write them for me. No one –everyone look at me–*no one* has the authority to grade you on this campus besides me. Not the Chair, not the Dean, not the VP –only me and the President of the University can issue a grade, and then only if the professor had been found mentally incompetent by.mental health professional or if I’m dead. The syllabus says you all need the book in class and your phones away and you need to be taking notes.
But, I’ve never gotten a zero !
You’ve been intellectually and morally molested by Democrats for 17 years. New sheriff in town, and he’s a Republican. You just got your first professor, Congratulations. Now take your seat .
Stunned look.
Okay, to continue …
Copyright Lucas J. Mather, 2016
All Rights Reserved
Originally Published to Facebook on Friday 18 Sept 2015 at 8:32pm